Time Outs

I am not sure if you are aware of this but I did have the greatest mother that ever lived. That having been said, one of her many life lessons she taught me was the principal of a "spiritual time out".

It all started with the question: "how are you going to handle being single in a church obsessed with marriage?" I really didn't know the answer. She gave me many suggestions but mostly she reminded me that what I had married was so destructive that nothing single could come close in destructiveness. Truth said.

Then she spoke of a "spiritual time out". She didn't mean going out and breaking all the commandments and needing the help of a Bishop or a church court. She was mostly talking about those times when you are overwhelmed with the culture of Mormonism and the judgement that comes with that and the need to take a breather to refocus and find the strength to dive back in.

This concept was pretty foreign to me. I had been through a lot these last few years and even missed church sometimes mostly because I was sick (both emotionally and physically) but what she meant was a glorified case of playing hokey from church. Could you really do that?

The answer is YES. I had been thinking for a while that I needed to rally to find myself again as defined in the auspices of a Mormon cultural persona. I don't quite fit the Molly Mormon mold but all my life I have been wholly dedicated to the gospel. Except for some minor hiccups as a very young teenager involving a slight violation of the W of W, I was and always have been the saintliest of saintliest girls. My gosh, I went on scripture reading dates as a young women at my request.

Here I am at 46 challenged at going to church. Why, you ask? Just ask any single adult member why? Our church is not single friendly! Don't get me wrong, I don't think it should be either. But hey, with that being said, I needed a "Time Out' and took it today and maybe for the next few weeks.

What I needed is to learn to love being at church again. Not being there makes me miss it and helps me to put up with all the proverbial hurdles that single people need to jump over in order to feel welcome. Revitalized I can put up with all the perceived wrongs, completely unintentional, that make church so difficult to overcome.

I look forward to wanting to be back. I know I will and when I do it will be because I want to be there and because I can contribute in a positive way.