Ralph W Sockman
Here’s another bandwagon. It’s a direct result of a situation that is occurring in facebook and involves my precious K2.
My daughters have left the fold; hopefully that’s not news to all of you. They do not define themselves as LDS and it context would probably be offended if you did, but not for the reasons you think.
I have tried to raise them to not be hypocrites. For that reason, to say you are Mormon and then live outside the principles would be hypocritical so they don’t and won’t define themselves as such. Hard for me to say but I do respect them for being who they are and unafraid of saying it.
With that being said, let me explain.
Proposition 8
Yikes, in even lettering the words it makes me shudder at the controversy. K2 read a note off facebook that addressed this issue from a LDS point of view (remember this reference) and took offense at the bigotry of it. She understood the argument but in it’s delivery it hit some low, unChrist-like blows, on the homosexuals.
She commented on it and spoke to the intolerance of Mormon’s in general and addressed what she felt was inappropriate comments about homosexuals.
It was never easy for my girls to be LDS. In the end, they just felt more accepted and less judged outside the confines of the church. It would be easy to give you all the nasty details but it would serve no purpose. They have left, and really, should be of no concern for most people. Those to whom their concern does lie have their backs and care.
What scares me here though is the verbosity of the comebacks and disregard of the reasons for her feelings. As members, we far too often dismiss the words of a disavowed member because they have "issues" or are "disgruntled". To say, "You obviously have been hurt but that is no reason to attack the church" is immature in thought and deed.
It is ridiculous to assume that the only reason people leave the church is because of some misdeed or sin they can not overcome. As if that would be the only reason for leaving. For some, maybe. For most, highly unlikely. We need to open our eyes and ears and really listen and for goodness sakes reach out beyond our precious Mormon bubble and truly see and hear what it is that is being debated about the church I know we all love.
We are powerful and have a huge network but if used in a way that can be conceived as bullying then what is it we are accomplishing and do we then not set ourselves up to be picketed.
Fact: We as members only represented less than 2 % of the vote in the California election. Yes, we were just a little fish in a big pond. But we network like no other organization and when our leaders issued their call, (http://newsroom.lds.org/ldsnewsroom/eng/commentary/california-and-same-sex-marriage) and we as a people responded it resulted in a 20:1 margin of donations and time. What does that mean exactly? It means that for every $1.00 that was donated by someone who wasn’t Mormon in support of Prop 8, Mormons donated $20.00. Cha-ching; now you see why people are mad. The Prop 8 organization had power and used it. In the end what should have been just another Proposition the ballot became a firestorm.
So I guess you are wondering what my take on the whole thing is. I am not really going to go there. I don’t live in California and if I did the wonderful thing about voting is it is a private matter.
But let me state this.
I believe in marriage. I believe in fidelity and peace. I have no desire to ever be okay that the rights for same sex couples to be married should ever be imposed to happen in our church because it does not straddle our doctrines. I don’t believe that is being demanded here, however. Can we really be so bold as to take choice away without risking greater consequence to ourselves? We know these are the last days.
Define LDS for me. Does it suffice with just one definition or does it have within its roots many different levels. Is one Mormon better than the next because he/she lives it differently? Is someone who attends the temple diligently, home teaches 100% by the 10th of every month, pays a full tithe, attends church regularly but emotionally crushes and abuses his/her family a better Mormon because of his perceived actions in front of others or is the silently dedicated, not so educated simple living Mormon who loves and adores his/her family more LDS. Can you really say and why does anyone think they have that right to say anything at all?
If we cannot even define ourselves as people and live in unity then how can we have expectations on the definition of something as abstract as marriage?
Here’s my point.
Have an opinion. Vote your opinion. But if it is criticized, rather than strike back, hold firm to what you know for yourself. This advise goes both ways. Do as your mother taught you and agree to disagree.
We cannot as a church do what we did and then profess that we are only a small percentage of the vote. We were, as a people, instrumental in the results of that proposition. Expect to be criticized! Expect to be protested and then, above all else, be tolerant.
Let there be peace.
Always!
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