Change in a Child

"If there is anything that we wish to change in the child, we should first examine it and see whether it is not something that could better be changed in ourselves."

~C.G. Jung, Integration of the Personality, 1939

Yikes, do I ever understand this quote. I remember vividly the day that K senior and her Dad were in a very difficult and oppressive argument. I was doing all that I could to find a way to mediate and then, the bottom dropped out. K told her Dad to take a flying leap (translated to not offend those reading this blog).
My heart sank. It stopped him because K had seen the same words stop him from coming at me but I realised right there and then that I just needed to change because my example was not good.

I have changed dramatically since then. My very vocabulary is altered and no longer includes those words, especially when dealing with others. Even in the last few months I have changed and continue to as I have a firmer grasp on my own emotional health.

Kids love us no matter what. Even in abuse, children will still seek out acceptance and caring from the abuser. It's their nature.

But if we really want the cycle to end then change must be initiated within ourselves. I wasn't the greatest of examples to my kids but NOW then can count on me trying to be. They can call me out if they think I am not and I can speak honestly with them. Remember though, that my kids are now almost all adults. We have earned this privilege.

If you kids are young, always just love them and show integrity. Be honest and always be the same both inside and outside your home. Kids need that. Consistency brings emotional health.

I have good friends who have raised there kids to be fine young men. They have come under a great amount of scrutiny but they have followed the mantra; "If it not morally wrong, hurting others, or illegal then let it be." I have often said it's a shame my girls don't match up in age because these boys will make fine fathers and husbands some day.

I endeavour to follow truth and the spirit in my life. I know the Lord's expectation of me as a parent. I hope when I finally get back to the Big Guy he will say, "Great Job, it wasn't easy, but you did your best."

It's all I can pray for. It's what I am here for.