"When the power of love overcomes the love of power, the world will know peace” ~ Jimi Hendrix
It’s funny; I lived in this surreal environment for so long that I have a hard time determining normal from dysfunction. It’s when I have the help of others that things are brought into a better perspective.
Have you ever wondered why the Savior had a three year mission before the very real reason he came here for was finally brought about. I am speaking of the atonement here. I was reading a dialogue between two people once, one was a member of a religion very familiar to me and the other, a Born Again Christian. The BAC was speaking of the words of the Savior and as he did, you could really understand the message. The other kept asserting the atonement and the resurrection and then it dawned on me. We study four volumes of scripture and they, one. Their entire focus is Jesus Christ and for that, hands down, they have an edge in knowing Him in their perspective.
It made me think; do I know the Savior? Besides His atonement, which I have great debt for, what more do I know about His life, His mission and what He taught in those three years He travelled with his disciples through Israel. I went about finding out, I still am, and because of that I have learned so much.
When Jesus laid down the tools of a carpenter and went forth changing a system ill equipped or wanting of change He came across so many unwilling to hear Him. The same could be said now, how many of us hear Him?
My sister taught me the greatest lesson of all about this when she said, “it isn’t about having others treat you as you would have them do but to find out how THEY wanted to be treated and then go about it”. In other words, serve – and then serve again and when you think you have served enough go out and do some more. I have slowed considerably in this department and always though it meant the church callings you had. Not so. Serving is done in so many different ways and can be just about the service to your family. I have a long way to go before I am anywhere near perfect here but alas, at least I get the message now.
I am making a monumental decision right now, one that Mom had to make at a certain point in her life as well. When I asked her why she made this one, her answer was so simple, “It just wasn’t worth it anymore”. I think now, more than ever, I get what she was saying to me. Sometimes, it just isn’t and turning yourself inside out about it doesn’t make sense. She set herself to being the matriarch of our family and she did a damn good job of it. She was and continues to be a great example of what the priorities should be in your life.
So here’s what it is in a nutshell. I don’t fit in, too many words, too many accusations, too much pain. It’s not a timeout – it’s a a break until I can figure out why I am there in the first place.
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